I read a post written by a lovely lady (Cathy Lynn Brooks) who keeps a blog devoted to her daughter, who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and lost her life in an accident about a year ago. Truly a tragic story! Her story had me thinking about my situation surrounding my dad’s passing last month.
I started my blog shortly before he passed. I started it because I took a course on WordPress and wanted to see how it worked. I now see him as my main motivation for jumping into this with both feet. I can tell Cathy is experiencing a similar feeling (although not the same seeing as the passing of your child is such an unspeakable trauma compared to a man who lived his life, had it good, and passed away rather quickly). Why are we so invested in putting our stories down on digital paper for all to see and seemingly reaching out for people who have felt similar experiences? The thing that occurs to me most is that, of course, we don’t want to lose them. Our loved ones are with us forever in one way or another. But there is a fear that if I don’t keep Dad in my thoughts, prayers, and speaking that I will lose him and may even forget what his face looks like. I thought about this at lunch today while eating my filet o’ fish meal and planning my weekend. As I glanced at my iPad and read Cathy’s post for the 3rd time I saw that we just don’t want to let them go. And then I saw the prayer card from my dad’s funeral that I’ve kept in my planner since his service.
“…we know they are not gone. For God has promised us a home through all eternity where life and love continue far beyond what we can see.”
That really hit home! Home… that theme keeps popping up wherever I look. I mean, just look at the name of my blog! Is it because I’ve declared that I will move home next year? Is it because I’ve realized that family is too important to let them slip away over time? Keeping them alive in our words is so ideal because not only do we keep them alive for selfish reasons (in the nicest way possible–because we miss them) but we connect with others using this platform of public streaming of consciousness who need to know that they are going through the same thing too and are not alone in their experiences. Hopefully we inspire others to go ahead, keep your loved ones around through the art of language and/or artistic expression. More and more I feel my dad there in my head telling me that I can do it. I can do it. He said so, so it must be true. He never lied to me. Not once. Justine is with Cathy and she is helping Cathy get the word out to others who have experienced traumatic loss.
Thank you, Cathy, for starting me on this inquiry regarding the sharing of our loved ones through words. It’s helped me to focus on why I do what I do. I know Dad would approve, and I bet he and Justine are proud of both of us.